Why Some Places and People Drain You – And What You Can Do About It
Ever walked into a meeting, a shop, or even your own office and just felt… tired? Like someone turned off your energy switch? You’re not alone. Whether it’s a person, a place, or even a task, sometimes things just suck the life out of you. And as a small business owner, that’s a real problem. You’ve only got so much energy to give, and you need it for running the show.
In this post, we’re going to look at why some people and places are so draining – and more importantly, what you can actually do about it. Don’t worry, there’s no fluffy nonsense here. Just real tips that work.
What Does It Mean to Feel Drained?
First off, let’s get clear on what “drained” means. We’re not talking about the kind of tired you feel after a long run or a late night. This is emotional or mental exhaustion. The kind where you feel low, unmotivated, and like everything’s a bit too much.
It’s not always easy to notice at first. You might just feel a bit moody or distracted. But over time, if it keeps happening, it can affect your work, your health, and even how you treat other people. That’s why spotting it early – and doing something about it – is so important.
Why Do Some People Drain You?
Some people just seem to take all your energy. They talk too much, they complain, they ask for loads of help, or they’re just… intense. Here’s a few types you might recognise:
- The Constant Complainer – Everything’s always going wrong. And they make sure you hear all about it.
- The Energy Vampire – They talk and talk, and somehow, you end up feeling like you’ve run a marathon.
- The Passive-Aggressive One – They don’t say what they mean, and you’re left guessing (and stressing).
- The Drama Magnet – Somehow, there’s always a crisis. And it becomes your problem too.
These people aren’t always doing it on purpose. Sometimes they don’t realise how they come across. But that doesn’t mean you have to put up with it.
Why Do Some Places Drain You?
It’s not just people – sometimes it’s the space you’re in. Ever notice how some rooms feel heavy or chaotic? That’s not your imagination. Your brain picks up on more than you realise. Messy desks, bad lighting, noisy backgrounds – they all add to your stress levels.
Here are a few common culprits:
- Clutter – Too much stuff = too many distractions. Your brain works harder just trying to focus.
- Poor lighting – Dark rooms can make you sleepy or gloomy. Harsh lighting can make you irritable.
- Noise – Background chatter, traffic, loud machines… it’s all exhausting, even if you tune it out.
- Bad vibes – Ok, this one sounds a bit “woo”, but it’s real. If a place has a history of stress or arguments, you might still feel that tension when you walk in.
- Colours – It’s well known that some colours are more relaxing than others. It may be funky to have a red feature wall, but is it counter-productive?
How This Affects Your Business
Now you might be thinking, “Yeah, it’s annoying, but I’ve got work to do.” And that’s the problem. Feeling drained makes everything harder – decision making, creativity, customer service, you name it.
If you’re always low on energy, you might start:
- Putting off important tasks
- Snapping at staff or customers
- Making poor decisions
- Missing chances to grow your business
Worse still, if your staff or customers feel the same way when they come in, they won’t stick around. That atmosphere matters more than you might think.
How to Spot the Drains
The first step is spotting what (or who) is draining you. Here’s how:
- Keep a quick energy journal – For one week, jot down how you feel after meetings, calls, or time in certain places. Don’t overthink it. Just note things like “felt great” or “felt tired and grumpy”. Patterns will pop up.
- Ask your body – Sounds weird, but it works. If you feel tense, heavy, or your mood crashes after seeing someone, that’s a sign.
- Notice your thoughts – If you dread talking to someone or keep replaying a conversation in your head, that’s another clue.
What You Can Do About Draining People
Here comes the tricky part. What do you do once you’ve found the people who drain you? Here are a few ideas that don’t involve full-on ghosting:
Set Clear Boundaries
You don’t need to be rude. Just be clear. If someone’s always dropping by to chat when you’re busy, try: “Hey, I’m flat out right now – can we catch up later?” Do it often enough and they’ll get the message.
Limit Your Time
If you’ve got a draining client or colleague, keep things short and sweet. Schedule phone calls instead of in-person meetings, or use email where possible. You’re allowed to protect your time.
Change the Topic
Some people just love to moan. If a conversation’s going south, steer it elsewhere. Ask about something positive or switch to a work task.
Say No
Yep, just say no. You don’t have to take on someone else’s drama or extra workload. A polite “Sorry, I can’t take that on right now” works wonders.
Cut Ties If Needed
Sometimes, you’ve tried everything and someone’s still making your life harder. If it’s possible (and legal), it’s OK to stop working with them. Your mental health is worth it.
What You Can Do About Draining Places
Now let’s talk spaces. These fixes don’t have to cost much – even small changes can make a big difference.
Declutter Your Workspace
Keep only what you need on your desk. Put paperwork in folders. Chuck out old coffee cups. It might not seem like much, but your brain will thank you.
Improve Your Lighting
Natural light is best, so open those blinds if you’ve got them. If not, go for warm white bulbs instead of harsh fluorescents.
Add Something You Like
Plants, photos, artwork – anything that makes the space feel more “you”. A touch of personality can lift your mood.
Control the Noise
If you can, use noise-cancelling headphones or play soft music. Even a little background sound can help you focus better and block out distractions.
Move Things Around
Sometimes a new layout helps. Try moving your desk to face a window or clearing a corner for relaxing breaks. Small shifts can change how the space feels.
Talk to outside specialists
If you have the money, time and imclination, there are people who can help you improve your wellbeing at work (and that of your employees). For example, based in Leicester but covering the Midlands, The Cooley Practice office a range of services aimed at helping corporate clients of all sizes to improve the wellbeing of their employees – there are likely to be others in your local area.
Recharge Your Batteries
Even with all these changes, you’re still going to have draining days. That’s life. The key is making time to recharge, just like you charge your phone.
Here’s how:
- Take regular breaks – Even five minutes away from your screen can help.
- Get outside – Fresh air and daylight are magic for your mood.
- Talk to people who lift you up – You know who they are. Spend more time with them.
- Do something just for fun – Not for money. Not for anyone else. Just because you enjoy it.
- Have a day out somewhere – Take the team on a teambuilding exercise, or even a trip to the zoo. A day out often allows you to feel better.
You Deserve Better
Running a small business is hard enough without extra energy drains. You don’t need to be a superhero. You just need to protect your time, your space, and your peace of mind.
Start small. Make one change today – tidy your desk, take a proper lunch break, or set a boundary with someone. Then build from there.
You’ll be surprised how much lighter everything feels when you’re not carrying everyone else’s stress or working in a space that drags you down.
Final Thought
If something (or someone) is draining your energy every day, you don’t have to just put up with it. Notice it. Change it. Protect your spark. Because when you’ve got your energy back, your business gets the best version of you – and that’s when the real magic happens.